Welcome, lovebirds and gamers alike! This Valentine’s Day, Temper takes you into a whimsical world where romance meets pixels. Captivating young Chinese women, otome games offer enchanting suitors and gripping narratives that draw you in–just “press start to heart,” basically. But as these ladies looking for love eagerly dip their dainty toes in the digital darling pool, one question lingers: Are they crafting a fairy tale or are they flirting with heartbreak?
Whatta man, whatta man, whatta mighty code man… On wildly popular Chinese lifestyle and e-commerce app 小红书 (xiǎohóngshū| Little Red Book or RedNote), hashtag “otome games” had raked in almost 700k posts as of February 14, with many users happy to show off “hubby.”
Dear Player, brace yourself for a whirlwind romance in the enchanting world of otome games (乙女游戏| yǐnǚ yóuxì in Chinese)—a place where you can be a young woman navigating love and adventure like a seasoned pro.
It’s a tantalizing escape, yet one must ponder the darker undercurrents flowing beneath this pixelated paradise.
In a society like that of contemporary China, where the quest for genuine connection is growing increasingly elusive, are people nurturing authentic relationships, or are they merely engaging in a series of self-serving simulations that distract them from the (sometimes admittedly messy) realities of love and intimacy?
Time for a deep dive into the lives of young Chinese women immersed in these virtual love stories: When fantasy met reality.
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Baaaby, I’m Your Maaan
Sing along if you know the song! Or opt for the alternative: “WHAM! Bam! I am! A man!”
Let’s dive into one of the hottest otome titles out there, Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice. Released in 2017 by Chinese game developer Paper Games, this gem is China’s first foray into the otome universe, and boy, does it deliver.
Picture this: you’re surrounded by four charming men, each one more irresistible than the last.
First up, we’ve got a playful pop star who’s surprisingly deep—think heartthrob meets philosopher. Then there’s the cool, collected genius scientist, hiding a quiet strength behind those thick glasses. Next up, a wealthy executive with a mysterious aura who slowly unveils his soft side. And last but not least, your reliable older brother figure, who’s not just there to give you advice but is also your no-nonsense business partner. Talk about a power couple, right?
As players navigate a series of challenges and make choices that could lead to love or loss, they’re not just playing a game; they’re crafting a destiny that’s uniquely, well, theirs.
According to Aurora Mobil, a data solutions platform, Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice is a hit with the ladies—94.2 percent of its players are women, with over 90 percent under the age of 30.
That’s right, this isn’t just any dating sim; it’s a cultural phenomenon.
Couple goals. The male protagonists in otome games tend to fall into familiar archetypes: CEOs, doctors or artistic souls, all designed to tug at your heartstrings. Image: RedNote
Digital Darlings
Otome games may have started as a niche genre in Japan back in the late 1990s, primarily played on handheld consoles and PCs, but they’ve evolved into a powerhouse of storytelling. These narrative-driven gems allow players to form romantic bonds with male characters through their choices, which quickly resonated with young women.
Over the years, the games have gained immense popularity and evolved into more immersive experiences, featuring intricate narratives and character development.
In China, the otome scene has emerged more recently, building on the success of its Japanese predecessors while adding a local twist.
“The main difference between Japanese and Chinese otome games lies in their business models and narrative structures,” Guo Meng, a narrative designer for otome games, tells Chinese New Weekly magazine in early February.
In Japanese otome games, players typically pay a one-time fee to access the entire game. They select a male lead and engage with a self-contained storyline that focuses on slow-paced, detailed character development.
In contrast, Chinese otome games often require players to invest time in completing tasks and may also encourage spending money to unlock new story chapters. These games tend to feature faster-paced romantic interactions and often introduce suspense early in the narrative to motivate spending. The plot continues to evolve with regular updates, creating a dynamic and ongoing experience.
On wildly popular Chinese lifestyle and e-commerce app 小红书 (xiǎohóngshū| Little Red Book or RedNote), which by the way saw a massive influx of overseas TikTok users in late January as they faced the looming ban of the latter app in the United States, hashtag “otome games” had raked in almost 700k posts as of February 14, with many users happy to show off “hubby.”
This localized formula has resulted in a rapidly growing market, capturing the hearts of millions of women across the nation. Titles like Love and the Deep Space, The Night Agent: A Novel and Light and Night have dazzled fans with stunning graphics and intricate plots, proving that love really is in the air.
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Yep, Love Is In the AIr
When speaking about this digital desire, it’s hard not to stumble upon some intriguing side notes. So here’s a little detour that takes us into artificial intelligence (AI), yet another contender in the young Chinese love game.
According to an article in newspaper Beijing Evening News from last November, Chinese Gen Z is enthusiastically swiping right on AI-generated partners, seeking sweet texts and deep conversations without the emotional baggage of real-world relationships.
In a culture where the pressure to marry and settle down is high, AI partners provide a low-stakes alternative to the high-stakes drama of traditional romances—no nagging in-laws and no ticking biological clocks, just “intimacy” on demand. It’s the perfect budget-friendly antidote to the dating pressure cooker of the Middle Kingdom.
Otome games are all about spinning tales and building connections, where players flirt with fate through dialogue and choices. The real magic of otome characters is in their storytelling prowess and emotional pull—not their pixel-perfect looks.
But research has revealed that people can form emotional attachments to AI-generated avatars, much like the bonds we create with real-life companions. It turns out that the more lifelike an avatar appears, the stronger the emotional connection users feel.
A 2024 study published in scholarly journal Computers in Human Behavior found that avatars that “look and behave more like real humans spark heightened feelings of empathy and social presence.” This means that when an avatar resonates with us on a human level, we’re more likely to forge deeper emotional connections. AI lovers often feature detailed facial expressions, realistic skin textures and lifelike movements, which can enhance the perception of realism. Add a pair of virtual reality goggles into the mix, and you’re all set to be swept off your feet by your AI sweet.
But not everyone is sold on this AI lover trend. Critics warn that relying on AI companionship could deepen social isolation, making real-life connections even rarer in this hyper-connected world.
Perhaps we’re witnessing a glimpse into a future where romance is less about “I do” and more about “I download.” The question remains: is leaning on AI for love a good choice? Only time will tell.
Yet, maybe the real answer lies beyond the screen—at a café or under the open sky, where love and life await those bold enough to chase them. In a world where swiping right has replaced the thrill of a real-life spark, let’s not forget: a digital darling, no matter how high he scores on the dreamboat scales, can’t hold your hand or take you out for tacos—because, let’s face it, real men come with dirty dishes, awkward silences, and the occasional surprise bouquet.
Whereas pixelated princes are just one algorithm away from ghosting you.
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Swooning to Spooning?
With the motivational pep talk out of the way, let’s shimmy back to the juicy heart of otome games.
The male protagonists tend to fall into familiar archetypes: CEOs, doctors, or artistic souls, designed to tug at your heartstrings. Guo makes sure to explore their vulnerabilities for added depth. Take Li Zeyan, or Victor, from Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice. He’s won the hearts of millions of women, and as player Wang Tianchen puts it in a February 12 interview with Li Qing, a reporter for Beijing Review, China’s only English newsweekly: “He’s the perfect balance.”
“He’s successful and confident, but he also respects the female protagonist,” Wang continues, “It’s not just about him being in control—he values her opinions and ambitions. That’s what makes him stand out.”
Successful, confident, and respectful—again, whatta man.
For many players, the connection with these virtual characters runs deep. “Even though he’s a virtual character, it feels like he’s right there beside me,” Wang explains. “Sometimes, the game even has him call me, making the experience feel like real companionship.”
Through Victor, Wang feels like she has gained insight into what mature, thoughtful love could look like—something she hadn’t fully grasped before. She also appreciates how the game addresses themes of sexuality in a natural, unrestrained way. “In real life, we’re often taught that sexual expression is taboo. But in this game, especially with Victor, the approach feels very natural. It’s not over-sexualized, but it’s not repressed either.”
But it’s not all rainbows and butterflies in the otome realm. Wang found herself stepping away from the game when Victor’s character shifted, feeling like he’d morphed into a product lost to the whims of developers. That inconsistency proved a real immersion killer.
Writing a 15- to 30-minute storyline for an otome game is no small feat—think thousands of words filled with plot twists, text messages, and side stories. Guo explains that these seemingly trivial details are essential for creating an immersive experience.
In addition to the main plot and romance arcs, scriptwriters must also include smaller details that pop up in the game–Mr. Digital Dreamboat whispering sweet nothings in his love interest’s ear on the phone, checking in on his woman via text message, creating social media posts that would make the toughest of gals out there swoon, and so the list goes on–to make it seem the “real deal,” if you will.
Because if the content isn’t engaging, players will lose interest faster than you can say “game over.”
According to Chinese market research and consulting firm Insight and Info, the market for female-targeted games is booming, with female players accounting for 25 percent of the gaming community in 2023, increasing from 19 percent in 2018. That’s over 300 million women seeking digital love, with a market value soaring to RMB 95.8 billion (around USD 13.1 billion).
Take Xuan Xuan, an office worker born in the 1980s, who’s spent nearly RMB 430,000 (USD 58,953) over the course of 10 months on her beloved otome games. “They speak to my heart,” she tells Beijing Review. “These male characters aren’t just pretty faces; they’re complex, emotional beings.”
Her investment goes toward unlocking new storylines that reveal the characters’ deeper vulnerabilities, their affection for her and backstories. “Different people play for different reasons. I want to experience everything. And to get there faster, I’m willing to spend,” she states.
Who doesn’t love a good plot twist?
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Tempting Times
Some critics are concerned that otome games might hinder players from forming real-life relationships, but Guo disagrees. “Most players can distinguish between the virtual and real worlds. Many female protagonists have become more independent, reflecting the personal growth of players,” she explains, continuing, “The majority of these women are aged 18 to 30, a time of considerable life changes. The female protagonists in otome games have become more independent and self-assured, mirroring the personal growth of the players themselves.”
Xuan echoes this sentiment, sharing how otome games have taught her the importance of patience in finding the right relationship and appreciating the small gestures that make love special. “It’s about the little things that show you care,” she says.
After getting over-the-knee-boot-deep into the sea of otome game-related subreddits–yes, we went down the reddithole– this author couldn’t help but notice a red thread running throughout the passionate posts:
Players rave about how these games serve as a playground for exploring romantic relationships in a safe, controlled environment. It’s like a buffet, where you can savor everything from sweet, innocent crushes to the more tantalizing flavors of emotional intimacy, jealousy, and even spice things up a little with a hint of sexual tension.
As players navigate these entrancing narratives, many will unearth insights about their own desires and relationship goals—kind of like doing a little soul-searching with a side of heart-fluttering fun. For many young women, otome games are a delightful escape—a private sanctuary to explore their sexuality free from the weighty expectations of the real world.
But, at the risk of sounding like a Debby Downer, let’s not forget that those perfect, scripted moments can set one up for a bit of a reality check.
A potential otome pitfall is that players may become so enamored with the fantasy of these interactions that they struggle to navigate the unpredictable nature of real relationships, leading to disappointment when their experiences don’t match the polished narratives they’ve been immersed in. Just make sure to keep one foot planted firmly in reality, we’d say.
Yet with the market blooming before our very eyes, one thing is crystal clear: digital romance is here to stay and play.
Powering down those consoles and stepping back into the real world, remember this: Where the stakes are real, the rewards can be even sweeter.
Just beware of the player.
#insertwink
FEATURED IMAGE: Posters featuring characters from Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice, themed around fireworks. The posters were released on December 25, 2024, in celebration of the upcoming New Year (COURTESY OF BEIJING REVIEW)
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Perpetually in pursuit of the greater good that is “China Fashion”, van Paridon set up The China Temper to help promote the dynamite dynamic fashion scene sprouting within Beijing, Shanghai, and China overall. Catering to anybody and everybody who reads English and/or Chinese, Temper covers all the basics and bases. From China's street style scenery to its budding photographers, internationally renowned designers, and underground quirks plus phenomena: We present one hot-hip-happening current collective weaving The New "Made in China" tag.
The term “Made in China” is undergoing the ultimate 21st Century makeover. Escorted by the increasingly strong influence of a new thinking among China’s younger generations, regarding individuality and the expression thereof, the fashion scene in the Middle Kingdom is exploding. And stretches far beyond what meets the eye. It’s appliqué, one might say.
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